Role Flexibility

The Family a Proclamation, probably has thee most controversial statement in it:

By Divine Design Fathers are to Preside, Protect and Provide the Necessities of Life for their families, Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of children.

The next sentence is a long the lines of helping each other in these roles as equal partners.

Except that to really be equal, and help each other in these roles one must view these roles as not black and white and set in stone. Not to let it become instead of Primarily, the world Solely, that Men are solely the heads of the family, and protect and provide the necessities of life, and that women are solely the nurtures of children. And that mothers do nothing else, and that father's do nothing else. Which it has, in many instances as far as what I can tell, been taken to be that way.

I think we need to practice Role Flexibility.


But how do we do that when we don't really see that in the scriptures with a clear example of Heavenly Mother and Heavenly Father and what they do? How do we see how we can do that in our homes when our own Heavenly Parents way of actually living is veiled to us, one by our own inaction of finding out, and two by our own insistence that it has to be only one way, never the other?

It is difficult, I must admit, and I myself am still learning. But if we do not have our Heavenly Parents example, we can sure turn to the scriptures to see where women played protector (and deliverer), provider, and presider, as well as nurturer.

Deborah is the greatest example of the presider role. It doesn't matter weather you think she was a Judge of the whole of Israel, or only a portion. What matters is that she was in that role, and she did have authority to make judgements. It shows loud and clear that women can be Presiders, which automatically gives the ability to be judge. And every woman reading that scripture should understand that. I think it is a miracle that this example of a strong woman in a presiding role made it through, I am certain there where others, but this one made it through. And in that same story, we hear of another woman who put a stake through a man's head. Name escapes me at the moment.

An example of protectors follow a more "traditional" route, Two women who protected all the male children born to the women of Israel while they where in bondage in Egypt. These two women where then protected because they protected the children. Weather you believe it was a Male God or a Female God who primarily protected the woman is besides the point as well. The main point of the story isn't "Do as God would want you to do, and God will protect you" (Though that is a point don't get me wrong). The main point is that women can protect, and often protect the very beings who are too vulnerable to protect themselves, that is children. We can call that nurturing, but in this instance that word is lacking. This was protecting, this was saving these children, and thus saving the whole of Israel.

The Nurturer role for me is a little harder to pinpoint. Which women are prominently displayed nurturing thier children?  I can not find an exact example in the Bible. But I can pinpoint an exact example in the Book of Mormon. It was Nephi's wife and her sisters that provided to their young children, born to them in the wilderness, food, while they where strengthened and found their strength to eat raw meat in order to provide food for their children. This story is told by a male glaze as so often the scriptures are, so we do not get a direct account of the experience from the women's point of view. But in my eyes, I see this as a great example of Women nurturing, during a trial that culture never prepared women for. I sometimes believe they came into their own strength. The Lord probably helped, but I often believe that it is women, who are able to find their own strength. Before this they where complaining. Well anybody would be if they found they where not capable of doing what they needed too. They probably cried, and prayed for some way to understand they where strong, and could make it through. We do not know the entire story. We can not really say. Another example of Women nurturing that grabs my thoughts is the Mothers who teach their sons all the words of God, after they loose their fathers to death  (after their fathers made an oath not to fight again), (again in the Book of Mormon). This type of nurturing is teaching gospel, not anything physical. It is a nurturing of deeper spiritual significance, which makes women the teachers of truth and light as well as men in their priesthood callings.

The Provider? Who are  the women who are providers for their family? Wasn't Ruth one for Naomi, when they came widowed and forlorn back from Moab, into Israel? Yes she got the leftovers from the harvest as other women did, but she eventually became a direct ancestor of David, through who's line that Jesus Christ would come. The best example of how a woman can provide for her family the necessities of life is found in Proverbs 31. Proverbs 31 teaches of the Industrious woman. And what about the New Testament? All those women who are mentioned provided cloaks, and food, and homes for the church after Christ was killed and resurrected.

And what about nurturing men? What about that? Christ was the perfect example of one who nurtured. He often used analogies of a Hen gathering her Chicks under her wing as one who protected. Milk and Honey are provided by the hand of God, sort of like Milk is provided for a baby from its mother. The female is weaved constantly through and through the bible. But often it is ignored. For whatever reason.

Yet it is there. Teaching us of Role Flexibility. Teaching us that Roles aren't set in stone, that every one can do these things. But the one thing that matters, is that we:

Love God, and Love our neighbors as ourselves.